


Hate Date

by PrussianInAmerica



Series: An Uncanny Ability to Annoy [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bickering, First Dates, M/M, Star Wars exists, Valentine's Day, mean pet names
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-06-01 14:41:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6524329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrussianInAmerica/pseuds/PrussianInAmerica
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux finally takes Kylo out for the Valentine's Day date he promised in <i>Unknown Number</i>.</p>
<p>Kylo Ren Approved Itinerary includes:<br/>-Lunch at CiCi's<br/>-A Star Wars Original Trilogy Marathon at the Megaplex<br/>-Taking advantage of any and all opportunities to annoy Hux</p>
<p>EDIT 6/12/16: I'm an ass and everyone who follows anything I write should know that by now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hate Date

**Author's Note:**

> AKA The Very Late Sequel to Unknown Number That Ian Forgot He Wanted to Write Until SkipperJones Reminded Him
> 
> But, again, that title was a little silly ~~(though probably better than the real one)~~.
> 
> Seriously, though. In the first couple days after Valentine's day I was planning their date in my free time, but it got lower and lower on the list of things to write until it fell off entirely. Then SkipperJones commented on Unknown Number and reminded me that that was a thing. Of course, other people also asked for a sequel, but they were all around the time I posted it and my memory isn't great. I'm sorry for the delay on this, and I hope you enjoy it.

It isn't until he's nearly to the park that he realizes he hasn't a clue what his mystery date's gender is, what they look like, or how to find them.

_"How the hell am I supposed to find you, genius?"_  
_sent 12:50pm, 2/14/16_

**_Lazy Asshole_ **  
_"Don't worry about it, Huxy."_  
_received 12:58pm, 2/14/16_

Great. Wandering around asking people who they are sounds like a good way to start the afternoon.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, he still hasn't found Kylo. He's beginning to think the asshole is hiding from him when he spots a monochromatic tree of a man standing next to a bench, holding a piece of poster board with **HUXY** printed across it in big, bold, clear letters.

_"Hell no."_  
_sent 1:22pm, 2/14/16_

The man shifts the sign to one hand and forcibly pulls a cell phone from the confines of his skinny jeans. He looks at it for a second before pushing his hood down and looking around himself, grinning when his eyes land on Hux.

_How does he even see through that mop?_ is Hux's only thought as the man- Kylo comes bounding towards him like an overexcited dog that's been let off its leash. He lands a couple feet from the Military History major in a rush of freezing air that has Hux pulling his coat closer.

” _What_ are you wearing?” 

The grin slides off his face as he looks down at himself. It's the middle of February and the man is wearing ripped skinny jeans, the rattiest hoodie Hux has ever seen, and converse. He looks like he should be stomping away from his disappointed parents growling, "It's not a phase, mom, GOD."

”I was hoping for a slightly different greeting.”

”Like what? ‘Oh, Kylo, take me now’?”

”No.” The taller man's cheeks flush and he scowls. “Just, like, you know, ‘You’re not what I imagined’ or something like that.”

”Well, you aren't what I imagined. For some reason I was imagining an adult.”

”Shut up, I’m twenty-one.”

”I’m twenty-two, and the last person I saw dressed like you was fourteen.”

”Ugh, are you gonna be like this all day?”

”It depends. Are you going to look like that all day?”

”I’m beginning to regret everything leading up to this point.”

”I was doing that long before now.”

”Ass.”

”Child.”

”You’re the one on a date with me.”

”You annoyed me until I agreed.”

”Fine. Come on, we’re going to lunch first.”

”At Chuck E. Cheese?”

”Oh my god.”

”Would you prefer Cici’s? I hear they have a pizza topped with macaroni and cheese that all the kids love.”

”You're horrible, and just for that we _are_ going to Cici’s.”

”Oh my god.”

”I can't wait to see you eating buffet pizza while sitting at a plastic table.”

”I hate you.”

”Hate you too, darling.”

”Awful asshole.”

* * *

It is just as bad as he imagined on the way over. Luckily, it seems they’re the only people aside from the employees willing to spend Valentine's Day at a pizza buffet. At least no one that matters will bear witness to his loss of dignity.

”What kind of pizza do you like?” Kylo asks as Hux grudgingly follows him over to said buffet. There appear to be a several types, displayed under lamps that play at heating the “food”, and one of them is indeed topped with golden spiral noodles.

”I don’t.”

”What?”

”I don’t eat pizza normally. I think Phasma made me try a slice a few years ago. It didn’t make an impression.” The other man slows to a stop a couple feet from the cheese covered disks and stares at Hux with an incredulous look on his face. “What?”

” _Didn’t make an impression?_ ”

Hux rolls his eyes and strides the rest of the way to the plates stacked at one end of the long counter. “It’s just bread with toppings, Kylo. I hardly see why people get so worked up over it.” He grabs a plate and moves to grab a slice of the closest thing to his hand, but Kylo’s hand wraps around his wrist before he can. He takes the plate from the older man with his other hand and jerks his head back towards the booth they’d picked.

”Go sit down. _I’ll_ get the food. You clearly have no clue what you’re doing and I can’t stand to let you think pizza is no big deal any longer.” The man-child begins piling the plate with more food than it can reasonably hold or Hux can reasonably eat, no longer focusing on his date.

Hux blinks at the man, but walks back to the table. He sits down for a moment, wondering how Kylo could become so serious over such a frivolous issue. Then he remembers the tall, plastic glasses neatly stacked within one another that the cashier had handed them when they paid and takes one up, moving to the drinks dispenser near the buffet.

When he returns to the table – cup in hand, filled with some kind of cola, he hadn’t paid that much attention to the brand – Kylo has three plates of pizza spread out over it.

”I have no clue what kind of food you _do_ like, so I grabbed almost one of everything. Didn’t want to try fitting more than three plates on this tiny table.” Indeed, the table was filled to capacity, even one more plate would have been dangerous to attempt. “I’ll eat anything you don’t like, but you’re definitely trying them all.”

”No human stomach is capable of eating this much in one sitting.” Hux remarks as he sits down. He struggles to find a place to set his drink down that isn’t at the far side of the table or right on the edge, but eventually he wedges it between all three of the plates, at the center of the table.

”You only have to take a single bite of them. You’ll have plenty of room in that prissy stomach of yours for that much. Plus some extra space for seconds or dessert.” Kylo nudges one of the plates closer to him and hikes his eyebrows up a bit, waiting.

Hux doesn’t even bother to sigh, realizing that it has probably lost some of the effect by now. He picks up a small slice that seems to be plain cheese and pepperoni and raises it to his mouth, examining it for a quick breath. Then he takes a small bite before he can convince himself this is ridiculous.

It isn’t horrendous. Slightly plain, but not bad. Hux sets the remaining pizza back down and spins the plate so Kylo doesn’t need to reach across the whole thing to pick it up. It’d be more expedient to just hand it to the man, but he feels like that would make it seem that he actually likes him. Kylo’s staring at him expectantly, eager for his opinion.

”I’ll tell you what I like after I’ve tried them all.” He eyes the slice covered in noodles and grimaces a bit. “Or, most of them.” Kylo pouts a little at this, but picks up the slice Hux had just tried and shovels the rest of it into his absolutely larger than normal mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shitty place to end a chapter, but I've been working on this for like, a week now, and I'm getting antsy about not having it posted. I have the entire date planned, so don't worry your pretty little heads about that. I would expect at least another week before the next chaper, though.
> 
> As always, please let me know if your find any mistakes or discrepancies, and thank you for reading!
> 
>  **NEW!** I have a new tumblr just for my fic, including sneak peeks and me making excuses about why updates are late [here](http://ianwritesfics.tumblr.com/)!


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